Tough doesn't always mean Hard.

The word tough seems to always be connected to the word hard but why?
when the going gets tough you preserver. Okay cut the bull because when the going gets tough, you cry, you bawl like a baby, or get scary angry but then someone comes along, slaps you in the face and tells you to suck it up and deal.  Okay, so that does not really happen( at least not to everyone ;) )
but somehow you put on your big boy or girl pants and you work through what's tough, so the association to things being hard when the going gets tough is common. What if things that were tough weren't hard they were yes, tough but not hard like you may have thought?

For example, raising twins is tough not hard because it's doable and making sure that none of your children are dead or injured is a win. Tough yes, because it is mentally and physically draining but hard no way because as I said before tough and hard can have two different meanings. Often hard is meant as "It's too hard" meaning you are backing down from the challenge but being tough is when you grab life by the balls and run like the wind, hearing it scream like a little B**** because you tackled what most can't. Am I making any sense here.

Growing up, I believed that life was as is, that what you seen is what you got and that change was almost impossible to accomplish. I had no sense of belief or hope or did I really even care. After enduring hell as a kid, hope was the four letter word that I had thrown out the window along with my care. So when thing got "Tough" times got hard, and I mean the hard in the sense of giving up.
After I was finally able to separate myself from my own private hell, my eyes opened and I viewed the world with promise because yes, times get tough and they may get so bad that it breaks you down and makes you question your very existence but working through and overcoming is the key because ( this may be corny) but life is too damn short to be HARD.

I suck at giving advice but I know that some kind is better then turning the other cheek so next time you feel that life is going to drag you down and become too hard, work it out, find out what in your life is tough and tackle what might seem impossible because you are your greatest conquest and giving yourself the ability to deal with the tough stuff helps build character and Grit, You can only benefit from a positive change.


Thanks,
Maddy

When the going... Goes Alone..

I could start with when the going gets tough but lets face it, it'll always be tough but the real challenge is facing it alone, no support and no pity just juggling the depths of despair with two arms and sleep deprived eyes.

You could say that having twins has changed me and in all seriousness it has, maybe for the better, maybe for the worst but some change is always for the best. A partnership is supposed to be an equal support system, not one that a member of the party picks and chooses what responsibilities he or she completes. When the going gets alone.. You suck it up. The other half of the party does not wish to join in on the newfound fun. The fun that has earned the main party goer, eight cups of coffee and a major headache the next day. Should I also mentioned that sleep deprivation affects the mind. When you place clothes into your wash but walk away to feed the threenager who won't stop screaming mommy because forbid he doesn't eat right then and there. You come back to the wash hours later before you go to the store and realize you hadn't turned it on. Sleep deprivation is when 2+2 is 5 and the argument is invalid because you can carry the 1.

When you have to do things alone you really start to evaluate the world around you and make a plan for how things should go, the sudden OCD kicks in and everything that feels out of place gets moved or tossed to the curb where it belongs because when your forced to go at things alone you adjust and some adjustments do not have room for those who don't care.

Learning even at my young age that people will do as people please, whether they have the biggest heart of gold or they are wrenched no good users who are only looking for personal gain. You have to do what you feel is the best and wasted time is best regained by removing what causes the loss in the first place.

If your going.. Goes Alone, reevaluate, take charge and demand a refund because you shouldn't be forced to adjust if you do not want to..

Thank you,
Maddie